by Tanya Muse
The Purpose For Writing This Testimony
My purpose for writing this testimonial is so that it might be used as a help, and an encouragement to those who may be going through the same thing that I went through years ago. Even if this does not personally apply to you, it may apply to those you now have contact with, or might have contact with in the future. Perhaps someway, you can relate. Having said that, I will begin.
A Trying But Very Rewarding Prayer Journey
I have been in the prayer ministry over twenty years. It’s been a long but very rewarding journey for me. I remember always having a desire to know God, even before I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and my Savior. Before I came to the Lord, I went through a time of rebellion. I had seen, and also experienced things in the Christian community that had upset me and along with that I had some of my own issues that I was dealing with. All of this caused me to turn away from pursuing the things of God, and consequently, I strayed and went my own way. My life became very complicated, and pressure began to mount up in my life. I finally came to the conclusion that the only way out was to turn to God, and so I did. In God’s mercy and love, He reached out to me and met me just where I was at. The Lord gave me a hunger and a thirst for Him that I cannot put into words. I acquired a Bible, and began to read and soak in His Word. I remember thinking, “If it’s not in the Bible I do not need it.” I did not want what man said, but I wanted only what God said. During the time of my search, I received Jesus Christ as My Lord and Savior. I was so thankful to Him for forgiving my sins and washing me clean. Through His word, I learned that because I now belonged to the Lord, I was assured of eternal life with Him forever. Praise God!
My Prayer Walk Through Thick And Thin
Through the years, God taught me many things. I remember always wanting to pray, but when I started attending prayer meetings, I found myself absolutely tongue tied, and very nervous for fear that someone would ask me to pray out loud. In fact, I was asked to pray many times and because of the Lord, I made it through.
I didn’t know how to wait upon the Holy Spirit. I didn’t realize that He wanted to lead and direct me not only in my everyday life, but also in my prayer life. I didn’t recognize His voice when He was speaking to me. I later learned that some of my thoughts were, in fact, the voice of the Holy Spirit, and not just my own. I had never known that way of praying before. All I knew and understood was the memorized prayers that I had learned when I was very young. I became very frustrated. There were times when I would start to pray and right in the middle of my prayer I would totally lose my trend of what was in my heart to pray and was unable to finish. I had no alternative but to stop right in the middle of the sentence and say, “I can’t go on because I have this block.” That was very embarrassing and frustrating for me. Needless to say, if I continued to take part in these meetings, things would have to change. I knew that I needed to deal with pride and overcome the fear of man, intimidation, inferiority, and more.
My constant question to myself was, “Why are you at these prayer meetings when you’re so nervous and having such a hard time of it?” I know now that I was there at those meetings because it was God that had me there. Like everyone else, I had to start from the first step, before I could go to the next. It’s like our own natural growth in life. A baby cannot grow up to become an adult in the same day. It’s always a process. Isaiah 28:10 says it this way, “For precept must be upon precept, line upon line, here a little and there a little.” We all must be patient and wait upon the Lord. He has the right timing for everything.
Well, this went on week after week. But amazingly, as the days drew closer to the time of each meeting,excitement would start to well up in me. One day as I sat at my dressing table getting ready for the meeting, I heard the Lord speak to me and tell me to read Psalms 32:8. My Bible was lying on the dressing table right next to me so I immediately opened it to that particular scripture that He had told me read. I was amazed at what it said, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you shall go and I will guide you with My eye.” The anointing of that Word reached the depths of my heart and I felt the rush of joy fill my whole being. It was electrifying to say the least. God is so faithful. He knew that I needed that encouragement and He gave it to me at the very right time.
It’s obvious that the enemy did not want me to attend these meetings, but by God’s grace and only by His grace, I finally broke through. However, this was not an overnight victory for me. Daily, I had to give God more of my time, I had to be patient with myself and also with the Lord as well. Discipline in every way was important. The Lord said, “Old things are passed away and now it was time to go on to the new.” I had to be willing. I knew that the Lord’s way was the best and highest way. At times, I would get very tired; however, so to speak, I had to keep on rowing my boat, keeping focused on my destination. I was bound and determined, with God’s help, that I would get to the other side where He had told me to go. In spite of the fierce winds and the high waves that had threatened to capsize my boat, I kept on. I knew that Jesus was in the boat with me and He would keep me safe and protected from all harm. Even today these storms continue, not only for me, but for all those who choose to follow the Lord. We must stay focused and keep rowing. The more we row, the more spiritual muscles we develop. And the more we row, the more we grow.
I Have Called You To Pray My Word
One day as I sat in my living room reading the Word of God, I heard these words deep in my spirit. “I have called you to pray my Word.” I had no doubt that this was God speaking to me. I was so excited. Almost immediately, I thought, “How can I do this? I’m a baby Christian, and my knowledge of the Word is very limited.” So I answered God, and said, “I don’t think I can pray the Word because I don’t know the Word that well. How can I quote the Word if I do not know where to find the Word? Immediately, I heard these words, “Use the concordance.” I answered Him and said, “But it will take me too long to look up the scripture when I need it right then.” There was silence, and I heard no other words from the Lord. By that, I knew I had my answer, so I proceeded to follow in what He had told me. It was hard at first, but the more I applied myself to this new way of praying, (it was new for me), the easier it got. I memorized key passages, and all of a sudden, I was able to open up and pray without being nervous. Instead of looking at my inadequacies, I started looking at God’s Word and concentrating on His greatness. I could feel myself rising up in the Lord. It was God’s anointing, but at that time I did not realize that it was. Little by little I became more God-centered and less self-centered.
My Bible Training Days and Beyond
In my search for the Lord, He led me to the Christ Unlimited Church and Bible Training Center which was under the Pastorship of Bud and Betty Miller. I joined that church and then went on to complete my Bible training at the Center. After that, I was asked to take the position of the Intercessory Prayer Coordinator for the church. I then became an elder and after that I was ordained as a minister.
After a time, the Lord raised up Bible.com and joined it together with the Christ Unlimited Ministries. The two walked together as one, complimenting each another. The Millers function as Directors and Apostles of this outreach ministry of which I was a part of.
If I knew at the beginning of my training that I would one day be in the ministry as I am today, I don’t know if I could have received that truth. Nevertheless, here I am as Prayer Minister for Christ Unlimited Ministries. It is such an honor to be able to pray and teach on prayer. I am humbled before God that He would use me to be a part of teaching and raising up prayer warriors for the Army of God.
Words Of Encouragement For You
I’ve shared all of this, to say to you today, “If you’re in a similar struggle as I was years ago, remember that God is and always will be faithful to you and the plan that He has for your life. His special plan for you shall manifest in His timing. Though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come. Be not weary in well doing: for in due season you shall reap if you faint not. He will bring it forth and nothing can stop it. All you have to do is say, as the Prophet Isaiah said in Isaiah 6:8, “Here I am Lord; send me. I will go for You.” As you submit to Him, He will do the rest. He is looking for willing vessels to be made ready for His use. Psalm 23:4 says, “Yea though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death and through the dark circumstances of your life, You shall fear no evil: for the Lord is with you; His rod and His staff shall comfort you.” He will never leave you nor forsake you. That is His promise.
We cannot go by what we see in the natural, but we must go by what we see in God’s Word, for His Word is truth. Heaven and Earth shall pass away, but God said, His Word shall never pass away. His Word is settled in Heaven; His Word is alive, powerful and sharper than any two edged sword; The entrance of His Word brings light; When you go the Word shall lead you and when you sleep the Word shall keep you and when you are awake, the Word shall speak to you. Last of all, He will wash you with the washing of the water by His Word, for it is all written in the volume of His book, Amen!
God be with all of you and may these words be an encouragement to you so that you will be filled with His joy, strengthened by His might, making you every whit whole. His plan is His will and His will is His Word.
Praise the Lord!
Sincerely in the love of Jesus Christ,